How to Avoid Cliched Villains in MBA Essays

The applicant had wonderfully weaved a story of failure and retribution with high points and low points marked carefully in the 500-word essay. It is not every day that you see an MBA aspirant skillfully playing with words, but one glaring problem stood out in the essay. The Boss, who was the opposing force in the essay, was described in just three words. The characterization felt one-dimensional in an otherwise masterful essay.

You can avoid creating clichéd Villain Characters in the essay with these three techniques:

1) Better than the Antagonist

In an MBA Application Essay, everything is relative. Sure the reviewer will use her experience to evaluate a personality but the words that you use to compare two persons: you and the opposing force will decide what images conjures up in the minds of the admission team. Don’t use ‘snarky’ observations about your boss.

“A narcissistic obsessive personality, my Boss turned the team from a caring people oriented group to a group that cares only about deadlines. The weakening of the team spirit happened right in front of me. In just two months, I had turned into a soulless competing professional whose only goal was to meet my deadline. It took a death in the team to question my choices.”

The essay invoked my curiosity about the death in the team, but the plain villain description of the boss “A narcissistic obsessive personality, my Boss” is a cop out against offering a better context about the Boss.

Say what you want but use the “Show Don’t Tell Approach.”

“I was always the mentor, the go-to guy when our team faced technical roadblocks. The team was lagging behind the schedule by three days. When I knew what was stopping them from reaching a milestone, I called a 20-minute brainstorming session. The 4’0 Clock meeting gave us the opportunity to discuss five major issues in our project implementation. On my way back to the desk, the boss took me to the side and said I was behind the schedule by 50 minutes. I thought he was joking and smiled but when he said that ‘my continuance in the project depends on this deadline’; I knew the team was undergoing a serious metamorphosis. I explained how I was helping the team meet a major milestone. He interrupted me and shouted, “First take care of your deadline.”

We were no longer the team that took care of each other. The constant pressure to outdo each other and the advice to ignore other team member’s problems started affecting us. I began to change from the team first person to a soulless competing professional. It took a death in the team to question my choices.”

We had to use 135 words to replace the ‘A narcissistic obsessive personality’ but by following a Show Don’t Tell approach, the applicant characterized the opposing force in detail, gave a context to the work environment, and set the backstory for the triggering event – “The death in the team”. More importantly, he compared the two main characters: the applicant – a ‘team first’ person and the boss – the ‘me first’ person.

2) Reverse Roles

Another exercise that would help applicants write a balanced narrative is to reverse the roles. Assume that you are the opposing force or for the above example – the boss. Why would you give a higher priority to individual performance over team performance? It won’t  be easy. You have to research about his previous projects, his failures, and the life lessons he might have learned. It needs talking to your colleagues who had worked under him.

One of the colleagues shared how the Boss has changed from the happy go lucky team leader to an obsessive taskmaster after the X Project. The client was unforgiving with their remarks when the team missed the deadline, despite implementing two additional features not covered in the initial agreement. The Management didn’t side with him, and the company lost nearly $1, 20,000 in penalties; a clause that was written after the project implementation had started.

Now how will you write the essay?

“I was always the mentor, the go-to guy when our team faced technical roadblocks. The team was lagging behind the schedule by three days. When I knew what was stopping them from reaching a milestone, I called a 20-minute brainstorming session. The 4’0 Clock meeting gave us the opportunity to discuss five major issues in our project implementation. On my way back to the desk, the boss took me to the side and said I was behind the schedule by 50 minutes. I thought he was joking and smiled but when he said that ‘my continuance in the project depends on this deadline’; I knew the team was undergoing a serious metamorphosis. I explained how I was helping the team meet a major milestone. He interrupted me and shouted, “First take care of your deadline.”

The ‘me first’ approach shocked me first but when I researched about the Boss, I learned why. The client had reprimanded him for missing a major deadline in his previous project. It cost the company $1,20,000 in penalties and much more in reputation. Not a single Senior Management sided with him. I assured him that the client deadlines won’t be missed, but he insisted on focusing on individual deadlines.

We were no longer the team that took care of each other. The constant pressure to meet individual deadlines without exchange of ideas started affecting the quality of the output. I began to change from the team first person to a soulless competing professional. It took a death in the team to question my choices.”

By reversing the roles, you peaked into the psyche of the Boss and gave an empathic view about ‘why’ the boss was behaving in a certain way.

3) Demonstrate your Emotional Weakness

Not all essays require a person as an opposing force. It can be your emotional weaknesses. Don’t include overworking or perfection as your weakness.

Fear is a weakness that even the best professionals face. They need not be rational. Fear of success, Fear of Failure, Fear of making the wrong decision, Fear of being unpopular and the Fear that ‘no one respect’ you are some of the authentic fears that we have read as weaknesses. What those fears forced you to do should explain some of the mistakes that you made.

How do you include one sentence that explains your fear?

“The ‘me first’ approach shocked me first but when I researched about the Boss, I learned why. The client had reprimanded him for missing a major deadline in his previous project. It cost the company $1,20,000 in penalties and much more in reputation. Not a single Senior Management sided with him. I assured him that the client deadlines won’t be missed, but he insisted on focusing on individual deadlines. I should have taken a stand when I noticed the team spirit eroding, but I was too worried about my reputation in the job market if I got fired. I had client appreciation letters in 85% of my projects, and getting a new offer would not have been that tough but the ‘fear of failure’ gripped me. The deadlines were nearing, and if I had quit at that moment, I knew the team would have failed. I tolerated the new strategy but for the team, the morale was at an all-time low. It started affecting the output. A death in the team forced me to question the Boss.”

By explaining the fear under which the applicant was forced to compromise his value (teamwork), and the moment the applicant overcomes the fear (fear of failure), the essay transforms from a one-dimensional ready to consume MBA Essay to a more believable narrative. The applicant cleverly explains why he compromised on the value – for the team (The deadlines were nearing, and if I had quit at that moment, I knew the team would have failed). In a strange way, the applicant compromised for the team.