“The man - shirtless, grease all over his body with a facemask jumped on to the window, barely holding onto the bars. He scanned the room from right to left. I sat at the left corner, two feet away from the Window. We looked at each other with shock and surprise waiting to see who will start the conversation.
5 seconds passed.
Who are you?
“I heard a burglar was in the neighborhood. We were just checking.”
After completing the reasoning, he disappeared. Shocked at what had happened, I slowly opened my door and shared the bizarre conversation with my housemates.
“I think I had a chat with a burglar.”
They rushed outside our villa, to start the pursuit, but it was too late.
Do you think this really happened to me?
Believability in an essay narrative depends on the description, the movement, and the epiphany. In novels, the author has the freedom in indulging in every minute details starting from the facial expressions, the fears and insecurities of the protagonist, the events leading up to the pivotal moment.
Description
In MBA Essays, the lesser the description, the more believable it would be. The moment you use up words to describe the scene, more than what you had allocated for your worries, hope, and insecurities, the reviewer immediately goes into a ‘critique’ mode, dissecting every single detail you had captured. They would most certainly make a face, thinking, “another aspiring novelist.”
While reading a novel, we expect the author to create a world for the readers, but in essays, it is about you more than your surroundings.
Offer just enough context while describing the scene.
The Movement
“The man - shirtless, grease all over his body with a facemask jumped on to the window, barely holding onto the bars. He scanned the room from right to left. I sat at the left corner, two feet away from the Window. We looked at each other with shock and surprise waiting to see who will start the conversation.
Note: The excerpt is fit for a blog not for essays, but just to illustrate my point, notice how the right mix of verbs pushes you to read the next sentence.
Applicants worried that they are not offering enough context, goes into describing the scene, often forgetting that ‘movement’ is the essence of a great narrative – in blogs, essays, and novels. Once you realize that, rewriting and editing, become much easier.
Epiphany
When I shared how movement is necessary to engage the reader, I could see the immediate impact of the advice on my clients. The 2nd iteration transforms the average essay into an interesting slice of life event. Some overdo the movement part just like the ‘scene’ by capturing too many verbs. Edit follows to balance the scene with the movement.
For the above narrative, the epiphany happened when I had a conversation with my housemates:
Shocked at what had happened, I slowly opened my door and shared the bizarre conversation with my housemates.
“I think I had a chat with a burglar.”
All the journey and scene would have no real impact if you as an applicant had no epiphany.
We are constantly undergoing minor epiphanies. When the event is relevant and life-changing – the kind you are likely to capture in an IMPACT table, the epiphany can be revealing for the admission team as well.
The more memorable the essay, the more likely you will stand out from the competition.
Read Winning MBA Essay Guide for Actionable tips, and memorable Sample Essays.
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